‘Dudeoir’ Photography: Should Dudes Make Nudes?

Unlocking men's self-esteem with saucy selfies

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I’m not a man you’d find on the front of a GQ magazine cover showing off my washboard abs. However, with the help of my trusty camera, I’ve learned that you don’t have to be an international model to finally appreciate yourself.

From someone who has wrestled on and off with body dysmorphia, I can tell you I haven’t always liked being photographed. In fact, I can barely look at myself in the mirror these days as my signs of aging become more pronounced.

I know that probably sounds vain, but I’m just speaking the truth that many dudes my age probably keep inside. Believe it or not, many men place weight on their appearance, which can damage confidence if we think we’re physically subpar.

You might be surprised how many men feel bad about their physical selves — at higher rates than women.

Men aren’t often encouraged to show off their bodies. This probably explains why most body-positive content I see online is from women using social media to share photos of themselves in various states of dress, which is often applauded.

Sure, some women might like the attention, and some already feel good about their appearance. They know they’re “hot” in the eyes of mainstream beauty standards.

But posting cheeky photos is not always to appease the male gaze. In fact, many women aren’t taking vulnerable pictures of themselves to attract sexual partners or gain compliments—they’re not doing it for others’ approval at all.

As the narrative sometimes suggests, they aren’t being forced into sharing images of themselves due to patriarchal pressure.

All bodies are worthy of photos.

Make no mistake—all bodies have beauty, mine included. We have flowing lines and bulges and hard edges and scars that we’ve earned. Humans are a wonderful feat of engineering from a functional and visual point of view. When presented in the right way, we are masterpieces in a gallery.

I’m here to tell you dudes that posing for a pro photographer—or your own camera’s self-timer—can also boost how you feel about yourself. The camera rarely lies, and it gains nothing by flattering us. What it captures is real. (Of course, it helps to have a handle on lighting and angles, which is important for any portrait.)

You don’t need to Photoshop yourself to look good like most of the male/female models you see in magazines have. A bit of tweaking with the contrast, maybe switching to black and white for that vintage look, can greatly improve your aesthetic impact. In other words, you’re already beautiful—editing coaxes it out more.

Turning the lens on myself

I have taken many portraits of men and women over the years. Recently, I did a miniature “dudeoir” photo shoot of myself. (I didn’t coin this dudeoir term: it’s the male version of boudoir photography, which is usually in the female realm.)

Women have long posed for pictures taken by skilled photographers in private. These saucy photos are often gifts for their significant others or just for themselves.

I discovered something interesting during my “selfies.” If I look at myself as art, I appreciate myself in a new light instead of someone trying to look attractive in a conventional way. Art is beautiful because it is unique and tells a story like all of our bodies do. Perfection is generally boring.

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Looking through the little series I shot in my office, I admired my shoulder muscles, developed from years of carrying my son up and down stairs. I’m not as twiggy as I’ve been called in the past.

While I’m still working on accepting changing features, I really liked some of the photos from these sessions. This tells me our perception can quickly shift. I found by taking pictures of myself that I look better than I do in my mind’s eye.

Embrace your inner exhibitionist.

This may all sound weird to some people (a dude posing for himself?) because this isn’t usually the kind of thing a man does, right? But from someone who has experimented with self-portraiture sans clothing, it’s quite an enlightening experience.

Some people may write me off as a strange old man. Maybe they’re right. But this is not about sending folks an unsolicited d*ck pic (please don’t do that, guys.) Again, dudeoir isn’t purely about sexiness (but hey, if someone gets enticed by your photos, you can’t help it!)

It’s about self-love and bringing others along for the ride. It’s about finally growing into the parts of yourself that were hollow and disregarded. It’s about ignoring the voices preventing men from liking their reflections and accepting themselves.

You may also unknowingly help someone else who is struggling with their self-image.

Here’s a great example of a dudeoir photo series from a pro studio, showing the beauty of the male form and how clothing, accessories, and technique can be used to achieve a certain mood.

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If you can afford it, hire a professional boudoir photographer who works with naked people often, and has a good reputation. Ask others. Check reviews.

Be tasteful

Personal expression is the key to good dudeoir. This isn’t Hustler or Playgirl magazine (do they still exist?)

This is a thoughtful expression of sexuality and identity. These are not explicit snaps of your junk taken with your cell phone to send to your current lover (although you could send them if both parties agree.)

As a straight, cis male comfortable with my sexuality, I can appreciate a beautiful human when I see one—male or female (or non-binary.) And I believe anyone can showcase their physical beauty with the right photographer—including you, bro.

This story originally appeared here.